Friday, December 14, 2007

Andrew's Pledge

I refound these video's from last year, and don't want to lose them so I figured I'd share them here to keep them in the archives.

Photo Sharing - Video Sharing - Photo Printing - Photo Books

Photo Sharing - Video Sharing - Photo Printing - Photo Books

Sunday, December 9, 2007

Andrew's 4th Birthday Party

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Busy as a Bee

Wow, the holidays are upon us. I'm excited to have so many fun things going on! I love staying busy and yet dread the stress of keeping up with it all. But even the stress is a little fun itself. Andrew is loving this season. He keeps asking for snow because he wants to build a tunnel in it and eat it. Mom is grossing out over that, but ah well, as long as it's not yellow we're all good. On an sadder note he keeps asking if we're ever going to move back to our house. This started because we went to our old neighborhood on Sunday and he saw our house. He knows other people live there but it's sad to hear him ask about it. This morning he tells me "We can't have Christmas in our apartment, it's not our home". Try explaining to a 4 year old that HOME is where we all are together, no matter where that is. He was asking why exactly it is that we moved... so I told him it's because Mommy had to go back to work and we had to move closer to his school. Then he tells me he wants me to work at Walton Centennial, the property I worked at right before AMLI, instead of where I work now. It took me a minute to figure out why he's saying that, and then it hit me... it's because we lived at our house when I worked for Walton, and now we don't and I work for AMLI. Damn he's smart. I tried to tell him one day Mommy would buy him a house again, but he doesn't believe me. I will though... so he should. And I may just let him pick it out if he's lucky. :)

So back to buzzing like bees. Andrew's birthday party is this weekend. It's hopefully going to be small and easy, but nothing ever stays small and easy with me.

Christmas parties and Birthday parties, get togethers and nights with friends. I love this time of year. I can probably say that about most times of year, except the dead middle of summer. There is just nothing really good about the dead middle of summer at all in my opinion. Yes, it's COLD now, but all the reason to snuggle in blankets and drink hot chocolate right??? Taking time from being so busy to relax and enjoy the season and good company.

There, that's my hallmark moment for the day. Hope you got a good visual. Lemme get back to some kind of work..........

Monday, December 3, 2007

Elf Yourself

Happy Holidays from our Crazy Family to Yours!

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Learning to Stand

Ok, so I swear I'm not just a country music fan. I like all types of music (isn't that what everyone says???) . Anyway, I do like country and I always have. I like music that tells a story and that speaks to you. This song was my fighting song the last 8 months and my friend Kirsten is the one that shared it with me after going thru a similar life change. I love her, I love Rascall Flatts and I love this song and I hope it can become a theme to my life anytime I fall on hard times.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

All I want for Christmas...

I am blessed with the funniest and most clever kid! I adore the way he cracks me up daily. Andrew and I were sitting on the couch watching TV. I had let him stay up late because I felt like we haven't had a lot of just "us" time, so we were chatting about Christmas.

"What do you want for Christmas?" I ask him.

"I want what's in the trunk" He replies.... because he was with me when we bought some gifts the other day... smartass.

"Ok..well aside from that, what do you want from Santa?"

He thinks....

"I want a hundred bucks!" he declares.

"WOW! what do you want a hundred bucks for?"

He thinks again... then tells me "well, because that's a lot of money"

"Yes, it is a lot of money. What else do you want?" I reply.

He thinks, and thinks, and thinks...

Then he finally states:

"I want yarn."

after I compose myself from laughing like a banchee, I dare to ask him why.

"Well, because I don't have any yarn"

Later I call his dad. I tell him the story... but stop at the $100 request.

His dad says "I can do that! I'll get him $100!".

"Good!" I tell him, "because I'm getting him YARN!"

Monday, November 26, 2007

My Chi for the Day...

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous “yes.”

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

“Now,” said the professor as the laughter subsided, “I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things—God, your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions—and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car.

The sand is everything else—the small stuff. “If you put the sand into the jar first,” he continued, “there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

“Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Spend time with your parents. Visit with grandparents. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your spouse out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first—the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.”

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled. “I’m glad you asked.
It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.”

Saturday, November 24, 2007

The Island

I'm flipping thru the People's Sexiest Man Alive issue and realized that my entire Island is on here! WHOOHOOOO for them!!! If you don't yet have an island here are the rules:

1. You get to pick 5 people to be on your island with whom if you were stranded with you would get a "free pass" from your sig. other to do with them what you please. Your island is whatever you want it to be, it really doesn't matter. My island, for example, has a 5 star full service hotel with other people that work there to take actual care of me and my 6 castaways. They don't count towards my 6.

2. You can have 2 islands if you go that way. Some friends of mine have up to 3 islands... a boy island, a girl island an an ethnic island. My island is just all inclusive (although no girls made it on the list... too bad for them)

3. People have to be living, have to be famous and there can pretty much be no chance in hell you'd ever run into them. If you DID run into them, there's probably still no chance in hell you'd get your free pass, but that's why this is a fictional island.

My Island:

Wentworth Miller

Milo Ventimiglia
Will Smith

Matthew McConaughey

Ryan Reynolds

The ones that are on my backup island:

Taye Diggs
Johnny Depp
Patrick Dempsey
Brad Pitt

Who's on your island???

My Petri Dish Household or Bringing Sexy Back

We can't shake the sickies here in the Martinez/Harris Household. GRRRRRR. The 3 of us sound like we've smoked a pack a day since birth (poor Ryan!) and my little voice is all cracky and butch (apparently scratchy Demi Moore type butchiness is sexy??? why do we spend money on hot lingerie when we could just scream for 3 hours instead)

Either way, the noses are running, fevers are coming and going and throats are sore and swollen. oooooohhhh it sucks. I even ate chicken noodle soup today in case it would work, it didn't. So I ate ice cream, didn't work either. I can't eat anything else in hopes of finding a cure or I'll be sick, butch and chubby... probably not so sexy.

I attempted to take the boys to see Bee Movie today. HA, that was just the same joke as the last time I tried to take them to a movie. We get thru the waiting the in semi dark theater, eating thousands of dollars worth of crap, then we get thru the previews (at which point I kind of forget what we came to see), then we get thru about 45 minutes of the actual movie before we have to leave. Ah well, at least we got out of the house. It seemed cute. I'll just buy the damn DVD and go from there.

I am in search of a Christmas Tree. I don't have real ones although I'd love one. I just don't have the patience to pick up all the pine needles my kids will pick off of it, so I go artificial. I was sick of my tree last year (I'd had it for like 6 years) so I gave it away and now I need a new one. My apartment is teeeeeny so I need a proportional tree. I want to find a pencil tree, skinny and tall just to put in the corner. Looked a few places today but alas, my search continues.

I'll post some Thanksgiving pics tonight!

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Thanksgiving Feast at Andrew's School

60 days and nights

It's Thanksgiving. I re-found my blog. I haven't written here in a while and things are pretty different. It's amazing how fast life changes. I thought about this because I have been trying to do so well with the thought of the Holidays. My first Holidays in 10 years alone. I have my boys, but like today they are going with their dad to his family's house. So I will be at my family's house alone. I was fine with that, thinking it would be great to just hang out with my cousins and sisters and not chase children around.... until I saw a damn Publix commercial about being Thankful. Then I lost it. I haven't lost it in a long while, but I did today. In the middle of breakfast, with the TV turned to the Thanksgiving Parade (one of my favorite things!) I broke down. Again. I am Thankful for my children, I am thankful for our health, I am thankful for my family and my amazing friends. I am thankful for old friends and new friends, and both kinds of friends in one. I am thankful for being on my own, being able to take care of myself and my children spiritually, financially and emotionally (well most of the time). I am thankful for my job and for my co workers who I adore. I am thankful for so many things. By the way, I am also thankful for therapy, and meds, and alcohol,... just a little shout out to the things that I used to get thru my hump. I am thankful there are guys out there that are perfectly fine with the fact that you have a family. And they want to be your friend anyway. I am greatful for my new friends who have given me a new sense of myself as a person on my own, not someone's wife or mother.

Anyway, there are so many things I'm thankful for. I am thankful I re found my now 2nd blog... and I think I'm gonna share it.

Saturday, September 29, 2007

Theme Songs of life by Keith

I've never been a music person, I don't follow the trends and I stick to the same ol' favorites that I love. But music has been more and more moving these days and I have been using it as therapy. There are so many songs that have been my theme song of life these days... Keith Urban is a favorite of mine and here are my theme songs of the last few months by him. I'll post more fabulous artists soon. I like having them on here so I can listen to them whenever I want to. Someone tell me how Keith Urban knows how to sing in such a way to touch my soul. WOW... so here's to Keith... Thanks for the tears and strength!

Stupid Boy

Tonight I want to cry

You'll think of me

Friday, September 28, 2007

People Watching

Today I went to lunch with my sister and her boyfriend. We met at the mall in the food court. What an interesting place to people watch. I wasn't eating since the thought of food these days makes the knot that's always in my stomach turn even more, so I just waited at our table while they got food. I found myself searching the faces of the people walking past, looking for some sort of sign. I saw business men with nice suits on, laughing and joking with co workers. They seemed kind of shallow, most were single I noticed but none were intriguiging enough for me to give a 2nd glance to. I noticed older couples walking thru the mall holding hands. That made me smile, then want to cry. They were holding hands probably much like they did 40 years ago and they still won't let go. I love that. Who I enjoyed watching the most were the moms. I know those moms. They are escaping the dullness of their home lives by venturing out to take their toddler to the mall. They come forth in khaki's and ill fitting t shirts with barely clean hair and no make up. They sigh all the time. Sometimes there are 2 of them together, with babies the same age and you know they just met recently at a 'mom and me' of sorts and are clinging to each other for friendship and conversation. I think I was one of these moms a whole other life ago.

In a way I miss the mall days. It is a right of passage all moms go thru.

My heart is sinking. My body feels like it's sinking all the time. I'm rarely not sad. I have become a pro at faking it. Actually, that's a lie, I'm not very good at that either. When I'm not sad, it's because I have to tell myself to enjoy what is going on. I have to convince myself over and over not to cry. My heart is all F*ed up.

Friday, September 21, 2007

I'm back... and the meaning of slander


In law, defamation is the communication of a statement that makes a false claim, expressly stated or implied to be factual, that may harm the reputation of an individual, business, product, group, government or nation.

So as you can tell this is a new blog. And being that I would hate for anyone to think of me as a nothing short of a law abiding citizen, the people with access to this blog is limited. I had to delete the old one due to accusations of slander... yep... seriously. So I lost all those little stories, all the photos, all the comments... all gone.

So an update! Me and the boys are doing okay. We're not doing SUPER but we're definately okay. Life has been full of ups and downs, good hours and bad, high emotions and low moments. I feel like I've been tested so many times and I'm just not passing. Okay I'm trying to write this without having a meltdown right here. Whew.... This summer has been a journey to say the least.

Let's see, I don't remember where the other blog left off so let me start off in the here and now instead of reliving the past. The boys and I are in our own apartment. It's so nice to have my first own apartment. Besides a dryer issue, it's really going well. The boys are sharing a room and that is suprisingly going way better than I thought it would. Bedtimes are still in full effect and potty training has continued with super success. They are both loving school. Ryan is taking a few steps at a time and is saying more and more words these days. He's still his own little person, not speeding up progress for anyone but himself. Andrew is a total boy now. There's nothing baby about him (besides the occasional tantrum) and he's so dang funny. He asks the MOST random questions, like "what does HOW mean?" . Every day he has a handful of questions like that for me and I just am in awe of his mental capacity for higher thinking. Having said that, he's still 3.5 and a pain in the butt when he wants to be! They are both adjusting well to the apartment. They see their dad every Wednesday evening for about an hour and then whenever the weekend schedule works out. We've been having to get creative on that the past few weeks because of some conflicts in schedules but it's still working out.

My divorce will be final in a little over a week. I wish I could put into words the anxiety I have over this. I'm feeling okay with the marriage being over, it's just this final act that has my nerves shot. I'm sitting here trying to think of why and I have no reason. Maybe because it's such a public forum sitting in a court room with all these other people who's marriages are over like we're all a part of the losers club or something. As hard as this life can feel sometimes, it's MY life and I want to really enjoy it now that I have a second chance at learning who I am and what I want. Trust me, I've definately been learning who I'm not and what I don't want.

I have to put a little note about how awesome my friends have been during this whole process, since ya'll are the ones who read this. I really love ya'll so much and I need to tell you just how much you've made a difference in this for me. From the moms nights in at my place since I couldn't get a sitter to the packing parties and porch nights... just everything ya'll did for me has been amazing. Even those of you far away who sent cards and emails checking in on me, ya'll are just the best friends I could ever ask for. I feel so lucky that I have so many amazing women I can count on and when times got tough ya'll really were there.

And I can't leave out the friend in my life who has been my rock thru the hardest time. I thank you for that and I miss our friendship. We knew it would be tragic, and it has been. Tragic and wonderful all at the same time. I wouldn't have wanted to go thru this with anyone but you, so again, Thank You. I wish you all the very best in your life, and though you will probably never read this, I know in my heart you know I feel that way. Muah!